Playing Games
by Rhonda1
Summary: *Conclusion updated*...Jack puts a game into play, using Vaughn and Sydney as pawns...*Post-Masquerade*
1. Game Plan

Disclaimer: All characters in this story belong to J. J. Abrams. Just borrowing for fun and mischief.

Summary: Jack puts a game into play, using Vaughn and Sydney as pawns. Will anyone come out a winner?

Author's Note: Even though the shows haven't aired yet, this takes place some time after Noah has re-established himself into Sydney's life. The following is pure fiction, so there are no spoilers. This is just something I wrote as a way of getting Noah to go away (He does absolutely nothing for me!)  Thanks for reading! 

*     *     *     *     *

Michael Vaughn entered the warehouse with some trepidation. This meeting he was about to have was not with Sydney Bristow, the person he usually met here, but with her father, Jack. The senior Bristow had arranged for this assignation with the younger agent, providing little information beyond time and place.

Jack was already waiting for him, a sign of impatience on his usually impassive face. Vaughn could actually feel the muscles in his body start to tense when he was faced with the Glare, his sarcastic moniker for the look of annoyance that frequently found a home on Jack Bristow's face.

"Good evening, Agent Vaughn." Jack's greeting was cursory. "Nice of you to try to get here on time."

_It is so like him to get me on the defensive right off the bat_, Vaughn thought to himself with a grimace. "We live in L.A. There's traffic." Vaughn replied with a casual shrug. 

Jack was not amused by his insouciant attitude. "Mr. Vaughn, I called you here to talk about Sydney." His tone was clipped and matter-of-fact.

"What about her?" Vaughn asked nonchalantly. It would not do to let Jack see how just the mention of Sydney's name caused him to react like a lovesick schoolboy.

"Mr. Vaughn, I know how you feel about my daughter."

Vaughn tried to feign innocence. "I don't know what you mean." 

Jack threw him a shrewd look. "Agent Vaughn, do I look like a stupid man?"  
  


_Was this a trick question_? Vaughn thought wildly. "No, of course not."  
  
"Then don't insult me by giving a bunch of lame-assed denials." Jack snapped at him. "You probably thought you were being discreet, but I did catch you checking out my daughter the night we went to Sloane's for dinner."

Vaughn flushed, the color in his face clearly giving him away. He thought he had been fairly surreptitious about the up-and-down sweep his eyes had made over Sydney's alluring person, but then again, Jack was a spy. It was ingrained in him to be observant.

"All right, so you caught me." Vaughn admitted. "What point are you trying to make by embarrassing me?"

Jack gave him a tight smile. "I think you would be very useful in coming between Sydney and Noah."

Vaughn winced at the mention of his newfound rival and didn't bother to hide it from Jack. His intense dislike for Noah Hicks stemmed partly from jealousy, but that wasn't the only reason he despised the man. Noah was one of those agents who had been in the loop; he had known that SD-6 was not part of the CIA when he and Sydney were together five years ago. He had known their true purpose, their capacity for greed and power. Yet he didn't let the woman he was supposedly in love with in on the secret. If he had truly cared about Sydney, he should have told her the truth about for whom she was really working. He shouldn't have let her devote her life to an organization that was a fraud, not to mention downright evil.

"Thank you for dispensing with any pretense about your feelings." Jack observed the younger man with an almost amused expression on his face. It wasn't that he was reveling in Vaughn's anguish that Sydney was keeping company with another man. On the contrary, he knew quite well what it was like to lose the woman you loved to a malevolent force.

No, his amusement stemmed from the nakedness of Vaughn's emotions; the way he felt was written all over his face. Jack would never have allowed himself to be so undisciplined. He always kept his feelings in check, so he always remained in control of every situation. It was a lesson Mr. Vaughn would do well to learn if he didn't want to be played as he was about to be.

And rest assured, Jack had no qualms about using Michael Vaughn's feelings for his daughter as a means for dividing Sydney and Noah. If he had to choose, Vaughn was infinitely the more tolerable of the two men. Noah Hicks was no good for Sydney because he was a man who willingly and gladly profited from the machinations of evil alliances looking to control the world. He was a man without a conscience and that made him an unsuitable match for his daughter.

Not that Vaughn was so much better. He was more honest, Jack grudgingly admitted. He took risks if threatened but he sometimes let his heart rule his head, resulting in imprudent decision-making. Vaughn was definitely too emotionally attached to Sydney, which could be a liability to her somewhere down the road. Jack knew he could trust Vaughn to put Sydney's life as his top priority, but his less-than-stellar grace under pressure might prove to be her downfall one of these days.

Having Sydney pine over Vaughn rather than doing God-knows-what with Noah was certainly more preferable in Jack's eyes. The fact that Sydney and Vaughn could never do anything about their budding attraction to each other was just an added bonus. Vaughn was not the right man for her, either, but he would do to pass the time until Sydney did find someone of whom Jack would approve.

Vaughn was pondering over Jack's sudden reversal of opinion where he was concerned. He knew Jack thought him too inexperienced, too attached, maybe even too incompetent to be Sydney's handler. Vaughn thought he had earned some points with Jack after he found the loophole in the Rambaldi Prophecy that saved Sydney from life imprisonment, but it appeared that wasn't enough. Maybe he would never earn Jack's respect, but for Sydney's sake, he would keep trying.

"Mr. Vaughn, don't take my willingness to work with you as a sign of approval." Jack remarked curtly, as if reading Vaughn's thoughts.

Vaughn jerked his head up, wondering how he did that.

"You are not exactly what I want for my daughter, either."

Vaughn's lips curved into a smirk. "But apparently, I'm the lesser of two evils, right?" He said ironically.

"Very well put." Jack nodded drolly. "You see, having Sydney follow her feelings for you instead of him serves two purposes. One, it gets her away from Noah's unhealthy influence. Two, she can never be with you as long as SD-6 exists, so I don't have to worry about her getting together with anyone else I consider unsuitable."

"And she says Sloane is manipulative." Vaughn remarked dryly. "Are you telling me you would rather have Sydney be lonely and miserable, waiting for a man she can't have than to see her with someone with whom she could actually have some semblance of a normal life?" He was incredulous that any father would want this kind of existence for his daughter.

"Wouldn't you?" Jack taunted him.

Vaughn flushed again, realizing Jack had tricked him. "I don't know if I want to be so devious when it comes to Sydney." He said, his voice hardened.

"I thought you cared about her." Jack remarked coolly.  
  


"_I do_." Vaughn shot back at him. "That's why I don't like the fact that you're trying to dictate the way she should live her life."

"Do you want to see her end up with Noah?" Jack narrowed his eyes at Vaughn. "He's not an innocent civilian like Daniel Hecht, you know. Noah Hicks is an SD-6 agent. That means Sloane would have no problem with it if Sydney wanted to marry _him_." Jack allowed the knife to twist just a little bit deeper.

_Ouch, that stung_. Jack certainly knew to hit him where he lived. "What is it exactly that you want me to do?" He asked, his bravado a bit deflated.

Jack smiled victoriously. "How quickly can you find yourself a date for the evening?"

"Tonight?" He frowned. "I can probably find someone." Vaughn said slowly, looking confused.

"Is she someone who would make my daughter jealous?" Jack inquired.

Vaughn thought quickly, mentally going through the slim pickings of his Rolodex. "She's gorgeous, if that's what you're asking."

Jack gave him a satisfied look. "Here is the name of the restaurant Sydney and Noah will be dining at tonight." He handed Vaughn a slip of paper. "You already have a reservation and the maitre'd has been instructed to seat you in full view of one another."

"Wait, what do you expect me to do at the restaurant?" Vaughn asked. "Seeing as how I'm not supposed to even know who they are, I can't exactly challenge him to a duel for Sydney's hand."  
  


For a brief moment, Jack Bristow allowed himself a genuine smile. "Do you expect me to do everything, Mr. Vaughn? If your date is as jaw-droppingly stunning as you say she is, Sydney cannot help but be jealous."

"And what will that accomplish?" 

Jack gave him an overly patient sigh. "It will force her to re-examine her feelings where Noah is concerned." He explained as if speaking to an extremely dull-witted individual. "If she has feelings for you, she certainly cannot be thinking about committing to him. When she realizes this, she will break it off with him."

"You're betting a lot on the notion that Sydney has feelings towards me." Vaughn pointed out. "What if you're wrong? What if she sees me tonight with another woman and she doesn't care?" He hated saying those words for fear they might be true, but he had to throw them out there.

"Then you and I will both know where you stand with Sydney." Jack said briskly. "I will have to think of another way to extract Noah Hicks from my daughter's life and you will know just how important you are to her." He said softly, his subtle jibe not so subtle.

Jack was turning to leave when Vaughn called him back. "Jack?" He purposely called him by his first name just to rankle him. Jack Bristow was always so formal with him, calling him "Mr. Vaughn" or "Agent Vaughn." He felt as if he had to have the upper hand just once.

"What is it, Mr. Vaughn?"

"I was just curious about something." Vaughn paused to make sure he had Jack's full attention. "In your opinion, is there anyone in the world whom you would deem suitable enough for Sydney?"

Jack's lip curled as he looked at Vaughn through hooded eyes. "Quite frankly, Agent Vaughn, no, there is not. Good night." Then he turned on his heel and stalked away.

_Talk about your grand exits_, Vaughn thought wryly. He pulled his cell phone from his pocket. He hesitated for just a moment before looking up the number in his phone book.

"Hello?" The female voice on the other end of the line responded.

"Hi, it's Michael." He said in a low voice. "Would you have dinner with me tonight?"

_To be continued_…


	2. Warm Up

"Welcome to Trattoria Di Napoli." The mustachioed maitre'd greeted them.

Sydney did a double-take and then realized she'd heard wrong. Trattoria Di _Nardi _had been the name of restaurant where Vaughn had wanted to take her for dinner when they had been in Rome. She suppressed a frown. Why had _he_ suddenly popped into her head at a time like this? This evening was supposed to be about her and Noah.

Noah placed a guiding hand on her bare back as they followed the maitre'd to their table. Noah probably wouldn't like the fact that she was thinking about another man when she was supposed to be head over heels about him.

No, wait, that didn't sound right. There was no _supposed_ about it. She _was_ head over heels about Noah, damn it! Now if only she didn't have to remind herself of that fact every ten minutes. Being in love was supposed to be freeing and everlasting and all-consuming. She shouldn't have to put so much thought into it.

"I'm hoping your culinary preferences are still the same." Noah said to her after they had been seated. "Do you still love Italian?"

"That is something that will never change about me." Sydney smiled at him.

"We should take a trip back to Rome soon." Noah suggested as he grasped her hand across the table, his thumb rubbing gently across her knuckles. "I found this great little restaurant the last time I was there. It's run by this tiny 70-year-old grandmother along with her three sons. The food is amazing. You'd love the linguine in clam sauce."

"Mmmm." Sydney said appreciatively. "What's it called?"

"Trattoria Di Nardi." Noah replied, blissfully oblivious to the fact that Sydney suddenly became very still. "Mama Di Nardi is the grandmother I was telling you about." He opened his menu and began to study it.

_Yet another reminder of Vaughn_, Sydney thought grimly. What were the odds that he and Noah would both rave about the same Italian restaurant? About a billion to one? Was there a reason he kept insinuating himself into her thoughts even when she was trying her damnedest not to think about him?

She kept telling herself she had no reason to feel guilty where Vaughn was concerned. It wasn't as if they had any claims on each other. She admitted that there had been flirting, maybe even a declaration or two, but that had been it. Their relationship—if you could even call it that—consisted of secret rendezvous in a cold dreary warehouse and those awful strangers-passing-in-the-night fly-bys where they couldn't even look at one another for fear someone might be watching. Was that enough to induce the guilt she was feeling for spending time with another man? Strangely enough, it was and she didn't know what to make of it.

With Noah's sudden reappearance into her life, naturally things had become strained between her and Vaughn. He was still unfailingly polite and maddeningly professional, but his manner towards her was distinctly more aloof. It was as if he were cutting himself off from her to avoid further heartache, but in the process, they both suffered. She wanted to talk to him about so many things—her search for her mother, her father's reticence in helping her, Sloane's motives for going against Jack's wishes—but it felt awkward now. Whenever they met these days, she got the impression that all he wanted to do was explain her counter-mission in as few words as possible and then get the hell away from her. He didn't exactly make it a conducive atmosphere for any heart-to-hearts. It pained her to think he was creating this chasm between them that she had no way of crossing.

With some regret, Sydney remembered the look on Vaughn's face when she told him that she and Noah were back together. A myriad of emotions had flitted across his face in a matter of seconds. Shock, bewilderment, hurt, disappointment. It was then that the tiny niggle of self-doubt began to take shape in the corner of her brain.

She should have been ecstatically happy at her second chance with a man who was her first true love. Wasn't he the one they said you never forgot? So why did she feel as if she were casting aside her future for another shot at reliving her past?

In getting back together with Noah, she was trying to rectify all of the mistakes in her past. Too many people in her life had made her fall in love with them and then they left her, shattered and broken by their loss. But now Fate was smiling on her and she was getting a golden opportunity to do things right this time. It wasn't going to be through any fault of her own if someone was to leave her again.

And it wasn't as if she still weren't wildly attracted to Noah. He was still able to make her pulse race, to drive her crazy with desire with just a single touch. The only thing was that her feelings felt diluted this time around; somehow watered down because there had been someone else added to the mix.

Sydney was distracted from her thoughts by the maitre'd, who had walked into her line of vision. She shook her head as if to clear it and gave a casual glance to the couple who were being seated at a table behind Noah but in full view of her sightline.

_Vaughn_?? Her mind shrieked and she couldn't help the little gasp that escaped from her lips. _What the hell was he doing here_? _And who was that blonde in the slinky red dress_?

"Did you say something, Syd?" Noah looked up at her.

Sydney tore her eyes away from Vaughn. "Um, no." She gave Noah a sheepish grin. "I just noticed that they had _cioppino _on the menu."

Noah gave her an indulgent smile. "Ah, one of your favorites."

She smiled sweetly. When he went back to his menu, Sydney cut her gaze back to Vaughn. _God, he was actually smiling at that woman_! She hardly ever got to see him being lighthearted. _Well, maybe if you didn't always behave as if the fate of the world was resting on your shoulders_…

Vaughn was well aware of the fact that Sydney had her laser beams trained on him, but he made no move to acknowledge her. _Trattoria Di Napoli_, he thought with a wry grin. If he hadn't been so positive that Jack had no idea about Trattoria Di Nardi, he would have thought it was a stroke of genius. As it was, it was just a very fortunate coincidence and Sydney had to have made the connection.

"Michael, what are you grinning about?" His dinner companion asked him.

Vaughn let his gaze fall on the woman sitting before him. Jack had wanted a knockout and he'd gotten one. She looked spectacular in a sleeveless red silk dress, the color setting off her golden good looks to perfection. Alice had always looked beautiful in red.

"I was just thinking how nice it was of you to come out with me on such short notice." He smiled charmingly, knowing Sydney was watching them.

"Well, you know I'm never one to turn down a free meal, but I am kind of wondering about the whole urgency thing." Alice raised an eyebrow at him. "Is there a reason I had to come out with you _tonight_?" She emphasized the word.

"No reason." He shook his head. "I just wanted to see you, I guess. See how you were doing."

"Oh, you mean you wanted to see if I was able to pick up the shattered pieces of my existence after we split up?" Alice said drolly.

Vaughn's lips curved into a smirk. Alice had a dry wit that he enjoyed. It was one of the many things he missed about her.

"I never saw you as the wilting flower-type, Al."

"You know me so well." She said breezily, opening her menu. "You really should put those keen observational skills to good use, Michael. You're being wasted at your desk job." Alice knew what he did for a living, one of the few people he trusted to tell.

"Thanks, I'll tell that to Devlin and have him laugh me right out of his office." He said glibly and then became serious. "Alice, before this evening progresses any further, I just wanted to say again how sorry I am for the way things ended between us."

Alice gave him a rueful smile. "For a moment there, I thought you were going to say you were sorry things had ended."

Vaughn shot her a sympathetic look. "Al, things weren't working towards the end. You and I both know it."

Well, if you're going to force me to admit it to myself, all right, it wasn't." She agreed matter-of-factly. "Now will you admit to me why?"

He looked confused. "I'm not following you."

"Michael, there was someone else, wasn't there?" Alice was nothing if not direct.

"Alice!" Vaughn looked upset. "I never cheated on you." He stated emphatically.  
  


"I wasn't saying you did." She said placatingly. "I know you are much too honorable to do something like that."

"But, that being said, even though you didn't cheat on me physically, would I be wrong in saying you were cheating on me in your heart?" Her blue eyes held a knowing look.

Vaughn was unable to meet her frank gaze, knowing how accurate she had been in her assessment of him. "I didn't realize it was happening until the woman began occupying my every waking moment." He said softly. "And eventually, my non-waking ones as well."

"Wow." Alice murmured. "So who is this object of your obsession?"

"I wouldn't call her an obsession exactly." Vaughn protested weakly. "It's just that I started out worrying about her on a professional level and then it got to be something more."

"So she's someone from work then?" 

"Yes."

Alice nodded resignedly. "Well, how could I ever hope to compete with a woman who goes out to save her country everyday?" She said cheekily.

"Alice, there was never any competition between the two of you." Vaughn disputed. "I didn't mean to fall for her as hard as I have and believe me when I say, I feel worse for having done it." He looked glum.

"Why? Does she not feel the same way about you?"

"It's complicated." Vaughn said cryptically. "At one point, I thought there was something between us, but then she became involved with someone else."

"Oh, so she's stringing you along." Alice said shrewdly. "And it's making you miserable."

"Pretty much." He nodded in agreement.

"Well, good." Alice's mean-spirited comment was said halfheartedly and Vaughn was able to see through her act. Alice wasn't as bitter about their breakup as she could have been and they had been able to remain friends.

"It would hurt me immensely if I thought you really meant that." Vaughn shot her a wry grin.

Alice sighed. "Well, don't be because I didn't." She gave him a sympathetic glance. "Seriously, Michael, I am sorry."

"Thanks." All of a sudden, Vaughn felt his pager vibrating and gave it a glance. He didn't recognize the number.

"Work?" Alice inquired.

"I'm not sure." He gave a shrug. "I better go call in. Excuse me." Vaughn stood up.

There was a bank of phone booths along one wall in the reception area of the restaurant. It was a rather old-fashioned set-up—kind of like what they used to show in old black-and-white movies where the phones were enclosed in tiny cubicles to insure privacy rather than sectioned off with those ineffectual glass partitions that were used nowadays.

Even though he wasn't Catholic, Vaughn had the vague feeling he was going to confession as he opened the heavy wooden door and stepped inside to make his call. He sat down on the low stool and deposited his coins into the phone. He then punched in the unfamiliar number.

"Turn around." A low voice commanded him by way of a greeting. He knew that voice. It belonged to the woman who had been haunting his dreams lately, causing him too many sleepless nights.

_To be continued_…


	3. Heat of the Battle

Vaughn turned in his seat and noticed for the first time that there were clear glass windows separating each phone booth. It was a slightly disconcerting feeling; instead of confession, he now felt as if he were visiting someone in prison. 

Sydney was staring at him rather pointedly from the next booth. "So you want to tell me what you're doing here?" He could see her lips moving, but her voice was coming through the receiver into his ear.

"Having dinner, same as you." He replied. The way she was looking at him was a little unnerving and he began to fidget.

Sydney looked skeptical. "Out of all the restaurants in L.A., you end up at the very one I'm at?"

"A colleague of mine recommended the place." Okay, so perhaps that was stretching the truth a bit. He and Jack Bristow might work for the same government agency, but they would never be "colleagues." Vaughn would always be a little intimidated by the older agent and Jack would always look at him as if he were something to scrape off the bottom of his shoe.

"Okay, fine, if that's your story." She remained unconvinced. "Now are you going to tell me why you're here with Alice?"

"You recognized her?" Vaughn was surprised. The number of times Sydney had been in his office could be counted on one hand and he had removed that picture of him and Alice before he could even reach the middle finger.

"Actually, no, that was just a guess." She admitted. "If you were seeing someone new, I figured you would have told me."

"No, I don't think I would have." He contradicted her, shaking his head.

Sydney bristled. He was definitely pulling away from her and she didn't like it. Maybe this was a case of wanting to have her cake and eat it, too, but she didn't see why she had to lose Vaughn just because Noah was back in her life. _Okay, so that sounded totally self-absorbed_, she chided herself. She knew why he was acting his way. He was hurt and so he was distancing himself. Wouldn't she do the same thing if the situations were reversed?

How did she feel about him being with Alice tonight? Was he trying to get back together with her? Sydney was surprised to realize just how much she hated that idea. Maybe she had no right to those possessive leanings—especially now that Noah was in the picture—but they were there all the same. Alice had given Vaughn up and Sydney would be damned if she would allow her to get a foot back in the door as far as he was concerned.

Of course, she knew it was wrong to feel this way. No matter how flattering it was to have Vaughn as a very obvious admirer, it wasn't very nice of her to keep him dangling on a string for when she got bored. If she were a better person, she would want him to find happiness with someone, even if it wasn't her. But it was hard to let go, especially when she wasn't quite sure she wanted to.

Vaughn peered through the glass at Sydney, who looked mildly insulted by his last remark. He knew she could tell how he had been closing himself off to her. If only she could understand how much it killed him to see her with Noah. The thought of him touching her, undressing her, _making love to her_ was enough to drive him insane. But it wasn't just the rekindling of an old flame that made his blood boil. No, it was the little things as well. The fact that she and Noah had a history together—as friends, colleagues and eventually lovers—of which he had no part. The fact that Noah knew things about her that Vaughn had no inkling of (_How did she take her coffee? Did she sleep in a sexy teddy or a comfy old t-shirt? Was she a top or a bottom?_). The fact that Noah could take her out for a goddamned dinner without it resulting in a late-night call from Sloane to an overseas hitman.

Noah had no business coming back into her life after all this time, he thought peevishly. Sydney had moved on. First, to Danny and then to…whom? _Him_? No, that wasn't the case. Vaughn didn't want it to be true, but in reality, they weren't anything to each other. Oh, he could sit there and dissect every little glance or conversation they had ever had for just a glimmer of hope that she felt the same way about him, but unless they actually confessed any true feelings they might have had to each other, it was all just silly, romantic, unrequited nothingness.    

"All right, fine." She said, feeling hurt, and she didn't bother to hide it. "You wouldn't have told me, but now I know, anyway. Are you and she trying to reconcile?"

"Sydney, that is a personal question to which you don't need to know the answer." Vaughn replied in a formal manner. "You shouldn't even be asking me such a thing."

"Why?" Sydney's voice was steely. "Does it make me sound too 'emotionally attached?'" Her question was dripping with sarcasm.

"Actually, yes." Vaughn's face was a blank slate.

Sydney felt as if she'd been kicked in the stomach. Did he have to be so cold to her? "Are you enjoying this?" She questioned him in a grievous tone. 

"No, I'm not." His eyes were grave. "I hate all of this."

"You could've fooled me." She said bitterly.

"Sydney, you're the one who set the rules here when you got back together with Noah." Vaughn reminded her. "I'm just trying to do my best to follow them, but you're not making it easy."

"What am I doing?" She asked, oblivious to his discomfort.

 He gave her an incredulous look. "_This_!" He burst out. "Syd, I feel as if you're calling me on the carpet for something that's none of your business."

"Well, excuse me, but I thought I was being a friend." Her tone was wounded.

"I think us being friends would fall under the category of 'emotionally attached.'" Vaughn pointed out annoyingly. "We're colleagues, Sydney. Co-workers."

"Yeah, and people who work together shouldn't be friends, right?" She flared at him.

"_We_ shouldn't be." Vaughn replied. "For some of us, having inappropriate feelings towards another colleague results in having to visit the company shrink." He said flippantly.

"Oh, screw that." She said irritably. "You and I _are_ friends and it's too late to do anything about that, no matter how much you're trying to deny it."

He gave a heavy sigh. "Okay, let's say you and I are friends." He shook his head, giving up. Arguing was pointless with someone as stubborn as Sydney. "Do you think that entitles you to interfere in my personal life?"

Sydney glared at him. He was making it sound as if she were a meddling old busybody who peeked out behind the curtains at her neighbors. "If I see you heading for a cliff, don't you think I should do something to stop you?"  
  


"It's _your_ opinion that I'm doing something reckless." He retorted. "If I want to jump off a cliff, it's my decision."

"And you expect me to just let you fall?"

"Yeah." Vaughn said matter-of-factly. "What I'm trying to get across to you, Syd, is that you shouldn't _care_ if I fall. What I do shouldn't matter to you and what you do shouldn't matter to me." His voice held a strange inflection at the end.

She caught his gaze. "But it does matter, doesn't it?" She challenged softly.

"Unfortunately, yes." He admitted, but he looked pained in doing so. "But the difference between you and me is that even though it's killing me, I'm not trying to head you off at the pass."

Sydney stared at him. "And what is that supposed to mean? Are you implying that _I'm_ headed for disaster in some way?"

Vaughn gave her a long look. "Well, if you want to know the truth, I don't think you're as happy as you want everyone to think you are."

"Oh, really?" Her eyes were shooting daggers at him. "And on what are you basing that rather biased judgment?"

"Take a look at where you are, Syd." Vaughn gestured with his hand to their surroundings. "You're in a phone booth ragging on me about being out with my old girlfriend instead of being blissed out of your mind with Super Spy in there. Don't you think that says something about what's important to you?"

"If everything's so damned perfect and wonderful between you and Noah, then you shouldn't care one whit if I'm with Alice. Hell, I could be here with Julia, Nicole _and_ Cameron and you still shouldn't care." His voice rose as he lit into her. "Yet you do. You care more than you're willing to admit." All of a sudden, his voice was dangerously soft. "Especially to yourself."

Sydney felt her mind reeling too fast for her to keep up. Was he right? She thought she had been making a selfless gesture; she was just looking out for a friend in need of guidance. But maybe she was actually behaving like a jealous shrew, scared she was going to lose the one man who truly mattered to her.

"Vaughn…" She said his name hesitantly.

Vaughn could hear the catch in her voice and it nearly did him in. "Are we done here, Syd?" He cut her off. "I do have a dinner date waiting for me, you know." He struggled to maintain his businesslike demeanor.

"Will you please give me a minute to speak?" Her voice shook, but it was still forceful. "You've made it perfectly clear that it was a mistake to call you. Obviously, you think I'm overstepping my bounds and that's your right."

"So nice of you to allow me to feel my own emotions." He said caustically.

"I had good intentions." She insisted, but the harshness of his words cut through her like a knife. "I thought you were…upset about me and Noah and so you were trying to take your mind off of it by taking up with Alice again."

"I guess I gave myself too much credit for thinking what I did affected you." She was surprised at how much it hurt her to find out she had a smaller influence in his life than she realized. 

"Surprise, surprise, but my life does not revolve around you, Sydney." Vaughn said mockingly.

"I know." Sydney felt tears at the corners of her eyes and blinked them back. "But when I saw you making what I thought was a mistake, I didn't stop to think that it wasn't my place to show you the error of your ways."

She gave him an imploring look. "Vaughn, I care what happens to you and I didn't want you taking two steps backwards in your life because of me." 

The look he gave her was clearly one of exasperation. "You do get a tad self-involved, Sydney, but this absolutely takes the cake." Vaughn shook his head in utter disbelief. "Before you go throwing that load of advice in my face, might I suggest you go look in a mirror?" He said acidly, giving her a look of displeasure.

"Whenever you figure out who it is you want, give me a call and maybe I'll still be around." Vaughn stood up to leave. "But until then, you don't get a say in what I do or who I see." With that parting shot, he hung up the phone and walked out.

_To be continued_…

Author's Note: Just an aside, but if you thought Vaughn was a little out of character in how he behaved with Sydney, it was intentional. I was going for an edgier Vaughn here because I think he needs a little backbone where she is concerned. Just thought I'd let you know where I was coming from. Thanks for reading.


	4. Taking Control

Sydney's mouth dropped open as she watched Vaughn leave the phone booth without a second glance. She couldn't ever imagine him being so rude and realized that she must have ticked him off mightily. 

Her head dropped into her hands. Lord, what could she have been thinking? Paging him in the middle of dinner, taking him away from his date just so she could discuss how wrong she thought he was for trying to re-create an old love? Wasn't _she _doing the exact same thing?

Yet Vaughn hadn't called her to task for it. He had made his disappointment obvious, but he hadn't lectured her or criticized her or told her she was making the biggest mistake of her life. He had simply gone along with her decision, no matter that he disapproved. Why couldn't she do the same thing with him? If she were really his friend (as she kept insisting she was), she should have been more tolerant. He was always compassionate and understanding with her, but she had failed him miserably.

Vaughn's uncharacteristically harsh tongue-lashing suddenly raised so many doubts within her. She thought she had been so sure about her and Noah, that they were headed on the right track, but obviously her actions tonight had proved her wrong. Yes, her feelings for Noah were still powerful and strong, but competing against them was the growing relationship she had with Vaughn. How she felt about him was still a puzzle to her, but until she figured it out, she had no business committing to Noah or anyone else at this time.

How did she even begin to sort it all out? And did she want to make one of the biggest decisions in her life in a restaurant phone booth?

Sydney let out a tortured sigh. Yes, she had to. She had to resolve things one way or the other _right now_. Because there was no way she could walk into the warehouse tomorrow and pretend it was just another meeting with her handler. They had crossed a line tonight. She had to face up to what she really wanted because if she didn't, she feared Vaughn would take matters into his own hands. He as much as told her that he was tired of waiting for her. Perhaps he would soon move on—professionally and personally—by turning in his resignation as her handler, marrying Alice and walking out of her life forever.

If only she could separate where her feelings for one began and the other ended. Their roles in her life were so very different, but in some freakish way, they were also so similar. They both protected her. They both kept her sane—or as sane as she could be with her convoluted life. They both looked at her as if she were the only woman on earth for them.

Sydney felt safe with Noah. Not just in the sense that he was an excellent wingman, but she knew what she could expect from him. Noah was irreverent and daring, cunning and kick-ass (while also looking unbelievably sexy, she might add) and they shared a history together as friends and lovers.

Vaughn, on the other hand, was like jumping into the abyss. He knew practically everything there was to know about her (even down to the size of her heart, thanks to the damned DSR) but he was amazingly close-mouthed about himself. What did she know beyond the facts that he liked the L.A. Kings and Italian food and his father was a CIA agent who was killed by her mother? To be fair, their bond was not one prone to many anecdotal discussions about mundane childhood memories of breaking body parts or losing out in the school spelling bee. Their conversations always had a purpose; there was never any time for idle chit-chat.  

She thought there would be time for that later. Because she did want to hear about his first kiss and his first fight and what kind of mischief he got into the night of his Senior Prom. But if he turned his back on her because of Noah, she would never get to know any of it and that thought made her feel unbearably sad. 

Noah was an open book to her. He was expressive and he liked to talk. She knew the name of his childhood pet, the fact that he always broke out in hives if he ingested one little peanut, the sound he would make whenever she kissed him right below his ear. _Mmmm_. Sydney found a slow smile spreading across her face as she thought about their steamy reunion in the safe house in Archangelsk.

_You just had to go there, didn't you, Syd_? She silently chastised herself. It was amazing how three little letters could mean so much. Sex. An extremely important component of any intimate relationship. She had experienced the exquisiteness of frenzied passion with Noah. The closest thing to intimacy she had ever received from Vaughn was a comforting yet somehow awkward embrace. 

Of course, she really had no business trying to make any kind of comparison between them in this area because Vaughn would come out on the losing end every time. It wasn't his fault, but she and Vaughn couldn't _do_ anything. Never mind the whole 'getting physical' aspect of a romantic relationship, but they hadn't even progressed to going out on an actual date yet.

Not that that was such a piddly little thing. It might be no big deal to everyone else in the world, but it was a life-and-death situation to them, thanks to Sloane and SD-6 and even their own government. Just the concept of dating was nerve-wracking enough, but when you threw in the fact that so many entities were against you—not to mention the whole death angle—it was enough to make anyone leery of getting involved.

She must have been cursed in a past life. Was there any other reasonable explanation why her romantic entanglements always ended in desertion or death? Maybe it was simply her ill-fated destiny never to find love or be loved in return. How else could she rationalize Noah's sudden re-entrance into her life at the same time she was beginning to acknowledge Vaughn's very tempting appeal? Sure, they risked death just being seen together in public, but it was hard to resist a wickedly enticing animal attraction. Suit-and-tie guys weren't normally her thing, but there was just something about his sweetly-shy-but-sizzling-just-beneath-the-surface, buttoned-down charm. He could look at her in a certain way and she would get all giddy and tingly beneath his gaze. Brad Pitt had nothing on Michael Vaughn as far as she was concerned.

Thinking about Vaughn's effect on her made Sydney's mind wander over to Alice. She had only seen her in that one photo Vaughn used to keep in his office, but she hadn't remembered her as being so attractive. _Alice probably hadn't been able to say yes fast enough when Vaughn asked her out for tonight_, Sydney thought cattily. Through a good deal of jealous grumbling, she had to admit they made a stunning couple. Then again, someone who looked like Vaughn probably always chose from the cream of the crop.

_Whoa_. She suddenly stopped short. Was this the first time she'd actually admitted to herself that he was an extraordinarily handsome man? Really, she never thought of him those terms. He was just…Vaughn. Someone she could talk to. Someone she could turn to. What they shared went deeper than a physical attraction, although his chiseled looks and astonishing green eyes certainly didn't hurt. Their bond was intensely meaningful and in some ways, she felt even closer to him than she would if they did have a physical relationship.

Because Vaughn knew who she was. He knew the Complete Sydney Bristow, with all of her faults and facets. She didn't have to hide any aspect of her life from him because he already knew it all and what he didn't know, she told him, anyway. She could always count on him to be supportive in a crisis or brilliant when she needed she had a problem that needed fixing.

But with everyone else, it was a never-ending struggle. She was constantly on her guard with Noah, Dixon, Will, Francie. They saw her as she wanted them to see her and it was always an exhausting ruse to try to keep the many tangents of her life from intersecting. But when she was with Vaughn, she felt free. Free to giggle and flirt and not have to worry that she might say the wrong thing and arouse the suspicions of any given person in her life. Those brief stolen moments with him were like gifts to be treasured. She didn't want to spend the rest of her life with one half of her always hidden in shadow. What she wanted was to bask in the full sunlight with nothing to hide.

Sydney checked her watch. She had been gone longer than was probably necessary and Noah would come looking for her soon. But she wasn't any closer to making up her mind than she had been five minutes ago.

_Focus, Sydney_, she instructed herself. _What do you value the most_? With a sudden flash of crystal-clear clarity, she had her answer.

Taking a deep breath, Sydney took a moment to compose herself before going back to the table. After doing a quick check of her makeup, she left the phone booth and headed back into the restaurant. She noticed Vaughn was already back at his table with Alice. He didn't even look up as she passed by. 

"I was about to send out a search party for you." Noah stood up to help her with her chair when she arrived back at the table. "Were you able to reach your father?" He inquired.

"What?" Sydney said distractedly and then remembered yet another lie she had had to tell. "Oh, right, yes. I'm sorry it took so long, but I had a hard time getting hold of him. Turns out it didn't matter because he did know about the meeting."

"Well, I'm glad you're back now." Noah smiled at her. "Are you ready to order?"

Sydney opened her mouth to reply, but something else came out. "I don't think I can do this, Noah." She blurted out.

Very deliberately, Noah folded his menu and placed it on his plate. "You can't do what?" He gave her his full attention.

"I can't go back in time." Sydney said in a direct manner.

Noah frowned. "I'm not asking you to. I want to move ahead with you."

"You want to pick up where we left off." She corrected him.

"Is that so wrong?"

"I can't pretend as if the last five years never happened." She met his gaze. "You left me."

"Syd, I thought we'd been through all that." Noah looked a bit frustrated. 

"I know it wasn't anyone's fault." She cut him off. "But that doesn't excuse you for not trying harder. You sent me a lousy email as a way of saying goodbye. Not only that, but when you sent me that email, you issued me an ultimatum that I had to choose you and go wherever you went without a backwards glance to the life I had here." Sydney was having a hard time keeping her voice under control. She didn't want Vaughn to hear them arguing.

"I didn't think you would want to stay here if I wasn't around." Noah retorted, although it wasn't as egocentric as it sounded. If anything, his comment came off sounding more injured in tone.

"And you were probably right." Sydney confessed. "I probably would have gone with you."

"Then why are you lashing out at me for asking you to do something you would have done, anyway?" His brow knitted in confusion.

"Because if you were so sure I would go with you, then it should have tipped you off when I didn't show up!" Her eyes flashed angrily at him.

Noah started to fire a heated comeback of his own, but then closed his mouth abruptly. What could he say? She was right. If he had been thinking clearly and not been so pissed that she'd blown him off, he would have realized that maybe somehow she hadn't received his message.

"It was an error in judgment on my part." He said in a conciliatory voice. "I should have realized something must have happened for you not to show up. I should have been more persistent."

"But instead you wrote me off." Sydney said accusingly. "And then I fell in love with another man."

"Danny." Noah said in a quiet voice.

"Yes, Danny." She narrowed her eyes at him. "He never would have given up on me."

"Sydney!" Noah said sharply. "How can you compare me to your sainted dead fiance? I'm going to lose out every time!"

She didn't appreciate him being so cavalier about Danny. "I'm just pointing out that there are some people in this world who stick by you no matter what and then there are others who cast you aside without a second thought." Her voice was cold.

"You're trying to pick a fight with me." He gave her a shrewd look. "Why?"

She looked him straight in the eyes. "Because I'm not so sure we're right for each other anymore."

"Sydney, how can you say that?" Noah cried. "After what happened at the safe house--"

"I'm not talking about sex!" She lowered her voice just in time to avoid every eye in the restaurant from staring at her. "That was never a problem between us."

"Then what is it?" He was perplexed. "We still care about each other, the sex is still phenomenal and Sloane obviously doesn't have a problem with us seeing each other anymore. Why are you trying to create obstacles where none exist?"

"I think it was a mistake to get involved with you again." Sydney tried to keep her voice composed and even. "When you made your sudden reappearance into my life, I had just found out that my mother was alive and I was feeling vulnerable. The only thing driving me at that point was finding her, seeing her again. I knew it was a longshot, but I had to go for it."

"And then I ran into you, another person from my past who made a rather abrupt exit from my life." Sydney gave him a rather pointed look. "I thought it was a sign. I thought if I was lucky enough to get a second chance with you, then there was hope that I would be able to get a second chance with my mother as well."

"So I went for it. I welcomed you back into my life without thinking just so I could keep you close. So you couldn't get away from me again." Her eyes were full of misery. "The bad thing is I didn't stop to consider if I still wanted _you_ or if I just wanted you around."

Noah's face fell. "You've gotten good, Syd." His voice was bitter. "I have to admit you had me completely fooled."

"Noah, I never meant to hurt you." Her voice grew thick with tears. "This isn't about getting back at you for what you did to me. I simply didn't think about the ramifications of you and I getting involved again."

"What ramifications are you talking about, Sydney?" His jaw was tense and she saw the muscle in his cheek twitch. "You're acting as if our relationship has some profound, far-reaching effect on other people when it should only be about us. I mean, I know your father is not that crazy about me and your friend Will doesn't like me much, either, but are you going to let how they feel affect us?"

Sydney avoided his gaze. "It's not just them." She whispered.

"Oh." His voice was flat. "You mean there's someone else."

Sydney was silent, so he went on. "I guess I should have expected that. I did, actually, and then I thought it was just a stroke of good luck that you weren't involved with anyone." Noah remarked in a weary tone.

"It's complicated." She gave a heavy sigh. "We're not really involved, but there's just something there."

"And I guess it's important enough that you don't want to risk it by taking up with me again." Noah surmised.

Sydney looked Noah straight in the eye. "Yes, it is important to me. It's more important than I realized and I don't want to lose it."

_To be continued_…


	5. Final Score

Sydney strode purposefully into the warehouse. After a restless, toss-and-turn night, she awoke that morning with a single objective. Keeping this goal in mind, she took great care in choosing her wardrobe for her early-morning meeting with Vaughn. That was why she was looking extra-hot as she sauntered between the maze of boxes and crates, sporting a sleeveless body-hugging black Lycra sheath dress and her favorite knee-high black leather boots.

Vaughn looked up at the sound of her boots making a staccato beat along the concrete floor, but refrained from speaking until she had come through the gate. It was just as well as he wasn't sure his voice would even work as he let his gaze capture Sydney's loveliness in all of its full-blown glory. She looked stunning that morning with her brown hair swinging and her long limbs moving gracefully towards him. And then there was the matter of that amazingly revealing yet somehow tasteful outfit that left him dazed and confused…

"He's gone." Sydney stated flatly before Vaughn had a chance to greet her.

"Who?" He said deliberately, knowing full well who "he" was.

Sydney gave him a steely look. "Noah."

Vaughn ignored the silent shout of glee that rang through his head. "I see." He said neutrally. So Jack's plan had worked. Vaughn let out an imperceptible groan. If Jack Bristow had been insufferably smug before, Vaughn could just imagine how he would be now that his grand scheme had resulted in such a favorable outcome.

"Is that all you have to say?" She said imperiously.

"What do you want me to say, Sydney?" Vaughn shot back at her.

Her sensuous lips formed a pout. "I just thought you'd have…questions." She finished awkwardly.

"Like I'm so engrossed in the twists and turns of your love life?" He scoffed. "I've got better things to do with my time." Okay, so maybe he didn't. Maybe it drove him crazy the whole time Sydney was shacking up with Noah, but damned if he'd wear his heart on his sleeve for her.

"Such as hanging out with _your _ex?" She flung at him.

He gave her a curious look. "Why does it bother you so much that I was with Alice last night?"

"Because you made it pretty clear to me that day we were at Griffith Observatory where your true feelings lay." Her eyes dared him to refute her.

"Yeah, and apparently what I said that day had no effect on you whatsoever." Vaughn's voice was cool. "You have no business hassling me about Alice when you took back up with Noah at the drop of a hat."

"Fine." Sydney said, miffed. If he was going to be so completely detached from her, maybe this wasn't the right time to tell him everything. "Just tell me my counter, so I can get out of here." She sat down on the folding chair and crossed her legs. That swinging boot was going to be the death of him.

_Nope, she wasn't going to get away that easily_. "You know, on second thought, I do have a question." Vaughn pretended casual indifference. "Whose choice was it for him to leave?"

"Mine, of course." Sydney replied without hesitation.

"Really?" He raised a skeptical eyebrow. "You're not trying to save face by telling me it was your decision to send him on his merry little way just so you don't have to admit he left you again?" His voice was unnaturally snide.

"No need to be cruel, Vaughn." She said coldly, her usually warm brown eyes like two pieces of ice. "Yes, he left me once before, but you don't have to rub my nose in it."

"Maybe I just can't understand why you even took him back after what he did to you."

"You don't know the whole story." Sydney said obstinately. "We had unfinished business between us."

"And apparently he still held enough allure for you to forget he broke your heart." Vaughn finished, unable to keep from sounding bitter.

"I didn't forget." She was quick to correct him. "Noah knew how upset I was with the way he left me."

"And that's the whole crux of the matter, isn't it?" Vaughn gave her a studied look. "Your abandonment issues."

"My what?" She narrowed her eyes at him.

"You have a fear of being abandoned by the people you love." He elaborated. "Your mother left you when you were a small child. Your father withdrew from you after your mother disappeared from your lives. Danny was also ripped away from you in a violent manner. Do I have to go on?"

"Did you go back to school and pick up your psych degree when I wasn't looking?" Sydney sneered at him. "Who the hell are you to pick at my brain like that?" She jumped up indignantly.

"I don't have to have a degree to know why you fell back in so easily with Noah." Vaughn said quietly, his manner far from superior. "You don't often get a chance to get back something you've lost. If it all of sudden comes back to you, I guess I can't begrudge you for wanting it back."

"Done with the psychoanalysis, Dr. Vaughn?" Sydney was still feeling a bit hostile.

"Am I wrong?" Vaughn peered at her. "Be honest, Syd." He was not trying to pick on her and he hoped she realized that. 

After several tension-filled moments, the defiant look on her face faded a bit. "Maybe there is some truth to what you're saying." She admitted in a soft voice. "When I saw Noah again after so many years, it made me think it was a second chance. I've thought so many times what I would give to have Danny miraculously resurrected and given back to me. This felt like the same thing."

"I didn't stop to think what it meant. All I knew was that someone I once loved had come back to me. I wasn't just going to stand there and let them get away from me again." Her eyes took on a sad haze. "All the people who have left me in the past gave me no say in the matter. For once, I wanted to be in control of a situation. Where it would be my choice if they stayed or if they left." 

"So I jumped back into a relationship with Noah." Sydney gave a helpless shrug. "Only I didn't realize then just how much it would cost me." She added softly.

"I didn't realize your feelings for Noah were so intense." Vaughn's manner was subdued. "You…loved Noah the same way as Danny?" He stumbled over the _L_-wordonly because he would rather not believe Sydney ever had deep feelings for the man. It probably wasn't true, but it made him feel better. Because Noah scared him much more than Danny. He could accept Sydney still having feelings for a memory; he had a harder time dealing with her feelings for a flesh-and-blood man.

"No, it was very different." Sydney shook her head. "Danny was sweet and loving and gentle and kind. He was a doctor, for Pete's sake!" She exclaimed.

"Noah couldn't be more of his opposite if he tried. He's reckless and daring and not exactly ethical considering he's working for Arvin Sloane." She said with some distaste.

"But the thing they had in common was that they both loved you." Vaughn pointed out. "And you loved them back." It absolutely killed him to admit that, but not saying it didn't mean it wasn't true.

"That's the operative word here, isn't it?" She caught his gaze and held it. "'_Loved_.' Past tense."

Vaughn heard the sharp intake of his breath. "Is it really?" His voice was low, but not without feeling. "In the past, I mean?"

"I thought going back to someone who made me feel good five years ago would still be able to make me happy." Sydney mused. "You were right when you said I have experienced a good deal amount of loss and I guess I saw Noah as something I could grab and hold on to. No one could take him away from me if I held on tightly enough." 

"But when we got back together, it wasn't what I expected. We just didn't click in the same ways and even though I wanted to go back to a time when my life wasn't so complicated, I couldn't do it. I'm a different person now." She said with a measure of satisfaction. "So much has happened to me that I'm not the same naïve college girl who fell for the dashing, more experienced older man."

"And it's not just because I know he's working for the bad guys." She added. "After I got over the initial shock of seeing him again, I came to the realization that I really didn't want him anymore. Some of the feelings were still there, but a lot of them…weren't. He just isn't the man I can see myself with five or ten years down the road." Sydney gave him a meaningful look.

Vaughn realized he was holding his breath and slowly let it out. She was giving him a sign, but he wasn't so sure he was ready to follow it. 

"What did you mean before?" He asked, stalling a bit. "When you said you didn't realize how much it would cost you to get back together with Noah? What exactly do you think you lost?"

Sydney hesitated. "We're being honest here, right?" She looked him straight in the eye.

"Just like always." He said flippantly.

"Vaughn, you and I both know that I depend on you a lot." She said carefully. "I don't just mean on my missions, but personally, too."

"You mean as a fall-back plan?" Vaughn said, a bit miffed. "Do I look like that much of a lapdog to you?"

"No, Vaughn, that's not how I see you." Sydney's tone was strident. "Although I will admit that I took you for granted." 

"I thought you would always be there for me, but when I saw you last night with Alice, I got scared." She said slowly. "I got scared that she might take you away from me and I think that's partly why I got on your case about seeing her again."

"Sydney, whatever happens in my personal life, it won't affect my being there for you." Vaughn told her. "You know you can still count on me."

She gave him a smile. "I can count on you even though you're still mad at me about Noah?" She raised a questioning eyebrow.

He looked chagrined. "He's not my favorite person and you know that."

"Tell me why." She goaded him deliberately.

Vaughn turned a green-eyed gaze on her. "Because he can share a part of your life that I can't."

Sydney let out an abrupt snort, surprising him. "Oh, Vaughn, if you only knew how little of my life I really share with him!"

"I don't understand." He shook his head. "Noah doesn't have the constraints put upon him that I have. He can be openly seen in public with you. He can meet your friends. He can take you to the hockey game that I can't."

"And what about all the things I can't do with him?" She countered. "I can't tell him I'm a double agent for the CIA. I can't tell him how much I hate Sloane and how much I wish he were dead. I can't tell him how much it hurts when my father stands me up for dinner." Sydney watched his face as she reminded him of that night on the pier.

"That was a long time ago, Sydney." He said quietly. "If Noah had been here then, I think you would have gone to him."

"No." She shook her head. "I still would have called you. Back then, I was still upset about finding out that everything I thought I knew about my father was a lie. I couldn't tell Noah any of that and I still can't. You're the only one I can talk to because you're the only one who knows the truth."

"Vaughn, how much of my life do you think I spend lying to people?" Sydney questioned him. "Would you say 80 percent of the time? I lie to people I care about and I lie to people I would cheerfully push off the top of Mount Everest."

"You're trying to protect them, Sydney, as well as yourself." 

"You know, I didn't want to lie to Danny about who I really was because I loved him and I didn't want there to be any secrets between us." She stated in a soft voice. "Don't you think that if I loved Noah in the same way I should have been willing to do the same thing with him?"

"Well, it's different with Noah. He works for SD-6."

"The principle is still the same." Sydney pointed out. "But I couldn't do it."

"You really think he would turn you in to Sloane?"

"I honestly don't know." She gave a sad shake of her head. "But what I do know is that I didn't trust him enough to find out."

"Vaughn, two of the things I value most in this world are trust and honesty. Probably because I find so little of it to go around." She added with a wry smirk. "I mean, who in my life do I trust and have complete honesty with? I trust Dixon but I'm not honest with him. The same goes for Francie and Will." 

"What about your father?"

Sydney looked rueful. "That's an ongoing saga, so I don't think I have either with him." She shrugged. "And sadly, that's the same way I felt about Noah."

"And then I thought about you." She gave him a little smile. "I have trusted you with my life on more than one occasion and you've never let me down. I can be myself when I'm with you and I don't have to put on a fake smile and pretend I like you and laugh at your jokes if I don't want to."

"Syd, are you telling you've just been giving me courtesy laughs all this time?" Vaughn kidded her just to lighten the mood.

She let out an involuntary chuckle. "You see, that's just what I mean." Sydney drifted close to him, near enough to feel the heat radiating between them. The effect was almost dizzying. "Why am I looking elsewhere when I have everything I want with you, Vaughn?" She murmured huskily.

Before she had barely finished uttering her words, he had pulled her into his arms. His lips covered hers possessively, with the intent of making her forget every other man that had come before him. Danny, Noah, her sixth grade crush, her senior prom date. Vaughn wished he could obliterate every speck of longing Sydney had ever felt for another man. But, knowing that was impossible, he would settle for being the only man she would ever love and desire for the next fifty or sixty years.

They broke apart at the same moment, slightly out of breath and more than a little stunned at the ardor and passion behind that first kiss.

"Wow." Sydney whispered, not trusting her own voice.

"I've wanted to kiss you from the moment I laid eyes on you." Vaughn's green eyes were ablaze with desire, so much so that Sydney felt the urge to blush. She could only hope her gaze was not a mirror image of his.

"The first time you saw me, I had fire engine red hair, black eyeliner streaking down my face and a swollen jaw." She pointed out to him. "Hardly a pretty picture."

"What can I say? I guess I'm attracted to freaks." He couldn't help but tease her.

"Well, then I guess you hit the jackpot with me." She quipped.

Vaughn sobered. "Sydney, I was just kidding you."

"I know, but it's still true." Sydney retorted. "The one person in the world I want to be with can't be seen with me if he doesn't want to wind up dead. If that isn't freakish, I don't know what is."

"Sydney, I think we just took a huge step in admitting how we feel about each other." Vaughn brushed a silken strand of hair away from her face. "Don't go putting a damper on it so quickly."

"I can't help it." She stepped away from his embrace. "I'm naturally pessimistic." She announced, her back to him.

"Liar." Vaughn chided her. "A pessimist wouldn't believe we could take down SD-6."

"Vaughn, we've barely made a dent." Sydney spun around to face him. "And if we never take them down, you know what that means for us, don't you?" Her face looked troubled.

"Secret trysts, elaborate disguises, maybe a clandestine little love nest tucked away from Sloane's prying eyes?" He grinned, trying to get her to smile.

"Vaughn, be serious!" Sydney wailed, having none of it.

"I'm sorry, Syd, I can't." He shook his head. "If I do that, I'll start thinking with my head instead of my heart and I don't want to do that."

Vaughn closed the distance between them, laying a tentative arm at her waist. "I know what it'll mean for me if I let myself fall in love with you and I don't care."

"I don't care if I never see you outside of this godforsaken warehouse if it means I can touch you exactly as I'm doing now." He encircled her waist with his other arm. Their bodies were pressed so closely together that she almost thought she could feel his heart beating inside him.

"Won't it get old for you after awhile?" Her eyes were anxious. "This place is dreary enough as it is. I don't ever want you to dread having to see me." She wanted so much to believe it could work out for them. That something magical and wonderful could come out of something that had started out so ugly and violent.

"That could never happen, Sydney." Vaughn promised her. "The thought of seeing you is what gets me up in the morning."

Sydney still looked uncertain. "Vaughn, what exactly is it that we're saying here? Are you giving me a guarantee that you won't leave me like everyone else?" She looked so much like a lost child that Vaughn wished he could just scoop her up into his arms and never let her go. "That you will be here for me for as long as I need you?"

"Syd, it's impossible for me to promise you that." He said gently. "I could get hit by a bus the moment I leave here."

"Cheery thought." She said morosely.

"But what I can do is tell you that I would never willingly leave you." Sydney raised her head to look at him when she heard the emotion in his voice. "If it were within my power, I would spend the rest of my life with you."

"Sydney, we have both experienced major losses in our lives and I think one of the things you take from that is that you have to live life to the fullest because everything you have could be snatched from you in an instant." Vaughn traced a finger down her cheek. "That is why I am willing to take this risk with you. You are the most amazing woman I have ever met and I think we would be fools not to take advantage of what we have for as long as we have it."

"Oh, Vaughn," Sydney's bones were turning to mush, both from his sweet whispers and his gentle caresses. "This will make things infinitely more complicated." She said weakly as he brought his lips tantalizingly close to hers. 

"But it'll be worth it, Syd." He whispered, as his lips captured hers once more.

THE END


End file.
